Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Anchor Yourself to Something Great

Hey Preps!

Kitty always has to sneak into the pictures...
He thinks he's a dog...I swear.

What are your goals?  Do you ever think about them? Sometimes I think we all have dreams that we are too scared to follow.  We get scared we will miss the mark, and fall flat on our faces.  Americans are great at making excuses, and putting on a front of who we want people to think we are.  We are all guilty of it...we want the perfect resume, and are scared to admit failure.  Worse than admitting failure, some of us are so scared to fail, that we don't even try to reach our dreams.  It's really heartbreaking to see.

I will be the first to admit that I hate failure.  I have slight OCD and really hate when I don't achieve a goal the way I wanted to.  Therefore, I feel as if I sometimes shortchange my dreams, and exchange them for second best.  Why?

Furthermore, I constantly struggle with talking about my real dreams.  I am terrified that if I talk about them, put them out there for all to see...that if I do fall short, I will look like I failed.  

So today, I am going to put a few of my life dreams out in the open.  Hopefully this will inspire you to do the same, and give you the heart and motivation to keep striving.  

This past weekend, I was at a Women in Business Conference at Colombia University.  We listened to a panel of entrepreneurs speak, and it was incredibly rewarding.  I have always wanted to own my own business.  I have no clue what that business would be due to the fact I am passionate about so many things in life.  Regardless, I have the heart to be out there in the real world making my mark.  I love working with people, and I can't imagine sitting stuck behind a cubicle desk my whole life.  Actually cubicles terrify me, and I am pretty sure I would be incredibly unhappy if I was squished in one for a career.  

Maybe I am not a normal human being.  I have no clue, but I hate being in solitude.  I would chose a room full of people over a cubicle any day.  Considering these characteristics about me, I know I need to apply this to my future career.  Where do I start though?  I have no clue.  

However the uncertainty is almost exhilarating, and I know that if you give me something I am passionate about, I will ensure that it becomes a success.  Sure I may fail a few times, but through failure, we grow. Failure allows you to step back and look at yourself or your business and see where it is lacking and improve.  

If we always look at failure as something that can help us change for the positive, maybe we would be more vocal about our faults.  Additionally, we might be able to be held accountable to our far fetched dreams.  

Sure, life doesn't work out the way we planned...but in my experience it works out in better ways than we can imagine. So, my advice to you today?  Find something you want to achieve, something you are passionate about...and go for it!  Anchor yourself to the positivity of doing something you love...and forget about the possibility of failure!

(Outfit of the Day: Sweater: Polo Ralph Lauren, Pants: Tommy Hilfiger Chinos
Sperrys, J.Crew Critter Bracelet, Etsy Sailor Bracelet)


Have a blessed day y'all!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

You're Strange, but I Like You

Hey Preps!

Oh, I am as corny as it gets.  Sure, I can be forgetful.  Maybe I am not
serious enough...I am allergic to grass, but I am standing in it.  One of my
favorite outfits are skirts and wellies.  This is me, and I am okay with
whether you like it or not.  It won't make me change, because
I am happy the way I am. 

Just watched this weeks episode of 'The Bachelor', which I DVR-ed.  Sometimes you just need time to unwind and watch a little bit of melodramatic TV.  'The Bachelor' is my show.  My girlfriend (and photographer) Amy, text the whole show.  Mostly it's cracking jokes at how desperate the girls are or why the bachelor is such a clueless knucklehead.  Regardless, it is my junkie TV fix for the week.

As I was watching the show today, I watched as several girls completely destroyed their chances of being Mrs. Bachelor, and they had no clue.  When they were rejected, they were shocked and kept wondering what they did wrong.  Statements like, "I tried to be everything he wanted" or "I gave up so much for him, why doesn't he want me, why am I not good enough" were common as they bawled their eyes out in the rejection limo.

It sounds completely pathetic but how many times do we do the same thing with a significant other?  We change for them, wrap our world around them, and try to be the best we can be...only to be left heartbroken and wondering what we could have done better to keep them.

My most recent past relationship, I gave up too much.  I was doing everything I could to make him happy, and that wasn't enough...I wasn't focusing on my career, what I wanted for my future, and was giving up my passions and time with friends to travel to see him.

When we broke up, I thought I was going to have a long road to recovery.  I didn't think I would ever find someone who compared to him...yet as I distanced myself from him and our past relationship, and started focusing on myself again, I have found true happiness.  I look at that relationship and see the flaws, not only his, but my own, which I stated above.  I have learned from what I did wrong in that relationship, and know I will never make those mistakes twice.

From now on, I am focusing on ME.  I have had so much more time to enjoy long runs, I am not tired from staying up late worrying about relationships, that I feel like I have the energy to accomplish whatever I wish.  There is no dwelling on when he will text me back when I go out with friends...the cell phone stays in the purse.  My career, social life, and fitness bring so much happiness into my life, that I wonder why I wasn't single sooner?  

It feels so great to talk about my accomplishments, and to help others without having the distraction of worrying about pleasing someone else.  Ya feel me?

So why are we so desperate in relationships sometimes?  If they don't want to be with you, then let it be. Don't ever try to force something to stay together that isn't working.  Chances are if you are already struggling now, you will struggle if you end up together.  A relationship should be a safe place where you don't feel judged or worried about saying the right things in order to keep the other person happy.  They should be proud of who they are with...and if they aren't...someone else will be one day. I promise.

Back to this bachelor show thing, it isn't the end of the world to be broken up with.  It may temporarily feel that way, but you can't dwell on it.  For me, it was an eye opener on how much of myself I had given up.  So I didn't dwell on the past a minute more, and have been living my life to the fullest.  I am proud of who I am...sure I have quirks, and things that will drive my future husband bonkers someday.  Yet, I won't settle for someone who doesn't love those quirks and doesn't respect me for who I am.

I am a firm believer that you learn from every relationship you are in.  What you learn prepares you for your future relationship and makes you a better, stronger person.  I did learn a lot from my past, and I am just content growing up a little on my own right now.

That doesn't mean I don't talk to boys though.  Oh baby.  So here's the deal...like I said earlier I missed my favorite TV show.  That rarely happens...but I had to deal because I went on a date.  Amy texted me saying, "Sheesh you must like this guy if you are missing your show for him".  Oh yes, it was quite the sacrifice, but I am happy I did because I had a great time.  Sure, it wasn't my first date since being single, but this time was a tad different.  The conversation was great, the guy was dreamier than the bachelor, and I think I am still permanently red in the face from being so flustered the whole night.  I haven't felt that in a while.

Does that mean I am going to text him constantly, or start planning the wedding tomorrow?  Heck no!  I am busy.  There is NYC this weekend, spring break, school, my career and internship, my fitness... I don't have the time to possibly do that.  Neither does he, and I like that.

So my advice to you?  Be happy on your own before you try to be happy with someone else.  Someone right is out there for you, but don't go searching.  Instead, live your life to the fullest...because that is when Mr. or Mrs. Right will come around, and they will love you for the weirdo that you are.

You are a weirdo you know.  Almost as big of one as me.  

Hope y'all are having a blessed week!

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Do You Remember Side Ponytails?

Hey Preps!

Growing up, it was evident that I was a 90's baby.  Oh yes, from Jellies sandals to Saddleback shoes...I was from head to toe 90's.  I rocked the side ponytails (that my mother lovingly called "Kalyns" because it was the fastest hair-do, and all the time I would allow her to put into the frizzy mane), and you bet my dresses had everything from cats to lemons on them.  

And you didn't believe me?
The Backstreet Boys were my heart throbs, Lisa Frank covered every folder and eraser I owned.  I was a living, breathing 90's statement.  I look back on that era and can't help but laugh as I already see the differences in the generation growing up behind me.  

Working in fitness, I get to become part of many new parent's lives.  It is truly rewarding to help a woman who recently gave birth shed the baby weight.  It is equally rewarding when her toddlers come running up to me and shout, "It's Mommy's best friend!".  I lose it every single time.  There is truly something about helping others change and better their lives that just grabs ahold of me.  Nothing in the world is more satisfying than finishing my day, knowing that I made someone's life a little bit better.  

Today, I was teaching a fitness class, when a young mom and her three kids swarmed into the classroom so mommy could grab a spot.  Her twin girls had side ponytails on.  She looked at me and stated, "The girls wanted to have "Kalyn Ponytails" today".  I laughed, I never realized it until now, but even today as a grown up I have the tendency to pull my hair into a ponytail that is still slightly to the side.  I guess some things are instilled in you at such an early age, that you don't even notice them anymore.  

Kind of like my hairstyles and my penny loafers.  

Yet, there are some things that we claim to be part of us, that sometimes we must change.  No one likes change, and no one wants to admit flaws...yet we all have them.  One problem I struggle with is shopping.  A girl can never have too many clothes right? Wrong. I have too many.  I literally could give away half of my wardrobe and still find a different outfit for every day of the year.  So why do I buy more clothes?  My money would be a much better resource if I were investing more of it, saving it, or using that money for experiences, not stuff.  Sure, I am a fashion guru, so I want to always look put together, but I can do so with the wardrobe I already have.  Of course I will not completely stop shopping, but I know that is something I can improve upon.  

What is the side ponytail in your life?  Is it eating the wrong things?  Avoiding the gym?  Is there a bad habit that you want to kick?  If so, it will be hard.  It will be hard to change the way you live your life currently, but I promise it will be worth it.  

My challenge to you?  Pick something in your life you want to change, and every single day make an effort to do so.  It won't be easy, but you will become a better, stronger you because of it.  Don't let it defeat you!
  
By the way, be sure to check out the blog, Campus Sartorialist!  I was featured in their most recent post, and they are an awesome blog to follow!

Photo Credits: Amy Rebekah Photography and Campus Sartorialist

Monday, February 6, 2012

Running Towards Balance

Hey Preps!
(This is my life: My foam roller, duck boots, gym bag, and kettlebell...
I am more than ready to hit the gym)

Do you ever just have one of those days where everything seems to go completely opposite as planned?
Today has been exactly that.  I overslept, the causing effector that lead to a day full of mishaps.  Oversleeping lead to a rush to scoot out the door...which lead to forgetting something or other, dropping that something, and being late.  Ughhh.  It's tough to stay positive when everything seems to be going wrong, and you seem to be the culprit of the chaos.  Do you have chaos in your life?

What is causing anxiety in your life right now? Anything? Furthermore, is this anxiety preventing you from being the best you can be?  Sometimes I ask myself that.  You see, I have this terrible tendency to put too much on my plate (hypothetically and occasionally literally).  I want to achieve a ton of different things at once...I am currently training for a marathon, am a student, teach fitness classes, work, intern, and want to have a life on top of all of that...it's sometimes overwhelming when I look at my planner and see every minute of my day scheduled.  How can I not be anxious or overwhelmed when there is no 'me' time?

There is where you are wrong.  Like I have said in previous posts, I am a huge fitness and nutrition junkie. I have a passion for running.  It's my therapy.  There is nothing better than a long run, completely unplugged from everything else in my life.  I get those endorphins pumping, and I feel like I can conquer anything in my life after I am finished.  For me, running puts balance in my life.  So does writing in my blog...it's an outlet for me to do something that I love.

Rebecca Hesker said it best when she stated, "Sports are like purification for me.  Every bad thing is taken away, the pizza I might have had the night before, the stress and anger from an argument, or just the frustration from work.  I become my favorite person again; the one who is not worried about what she looks like or how others see her; the one who is a strong determined fighter."

If you look at your workouts the way Rebecca does, I bet it will be easier for you to hit the gym.

It is possible to achieve at a high level, be busy, and still live a balanced life.  However, a great deal of society makes excuses as to why they don't do the things they love anymore.  "I would come to the gym more...but..."

You fill in the blank.  It doesn't even have to be about exercise.  It can be about doing anything you love.  Why did you stop doing it?  Do you REALLY have no time or are you wasting it on something else?  Sure, there are days I want to come home and just plop down on the couch with a junkie show like, "The Bachelor".  However, is that giving me the fulfillment and balance in my life that I need?  Probably not.

So the moral of this post?  Find time to have 'you' time.  Do something you love, be with someone you love...because that will give you balance.  The moments you are happiest are the ones you will treasure forever...not the stress in between.