Today was hard. Really hard. As we all celebrate the Fourth of July weekend with barbecues, fireworks, and fun with family and friends...it has been hard for me to be truly happy. I am probably one of the most positive people you will ever meet. I always try to find good in every situation, and am so blessed in my life. Yet today, someone was missing from all of these celebrations...Pat.
It was planned last weekend when I dreadfully parted ways with Pat in Annapolis, that I would go down to Virginia Beach (where he is currently doing a second block pilot cruise) to spend this long weekend with him...but Monday I was informed that he would be gone for a week starting three days ago. Gone on a carrier. A ship. Who knows where...on the Fourth of July.
The first few days were okay, I was busy with my internship and work...but today was tough because I spent the day with my family celebrating. Pat and I are always to an extent, long distance. Yet, I normally can talk to him at LEAST by texts daily.
All of the flags are out, and patriotism for America is so prevalent this weekend. Everywhere I turn I am reminded of Pat. What stinks is I can't even e-mail Pat right now. He is out of contact on the weekend that I truly want to tell him how thankful I am for him, and what he does. The whole reason for this weekend is to celebrate the independence of such a great country...which is a legacy of those who serve, and have served in the military, sacrificing their lives, time, and families to defend everything we hold dear.
To me, being away from Pat this weekend brings a new appreciation to this holiday. I know Pat does not want to be on a ship for the Fourth of July, nor do I want to be apart from him. There will be more times like this though. He will be deployed eventually, and there will be times where I am alone.
You know what though?
He's worth it. He's worth being lonely, and having to kill bugs at my house all by myself, and being scared. He's worth being long distance, and not hearing from him daily...and he is worth all my commitment and love.
So this Fourth of July, Pat will be on my mind. Even though I am excited for the events to come the next two days, in the back of my head, it won't be the same without my best friend.
Sorry for the emo post, I truly am so blessed. Blessed to have Pat, and blessed to be part of such an amazing country.
Happy Fourth of July to Y'all! God Bless!